Vietnam

Some of you might know that I am bound for Vietnam this summer. On July 26th, I will travel to the other side of the earth with a team from my church, Area 10 Faith Community. Our task is to provide critically needed supplies for and build lasting relationships with the staff and children of SS3, a state-run orphanage 45 minutes outside of Hanoi.

It might sound strange, but making the decision to go on this trip was both simple and extremely difficult -- simple, in that I have always wanted to do something like this and now felt like the time; difficult in that I knew there would be many hurdles to jump in order to make it happen (and if you know me, you know I'm no hurdler!). There was also no guarantee that, even if I threw my name in the hat, I would be chosen to go.

Ultimately, I chose to cast all the "difficulties" aside and trust the simple urge in my heart. I applied and was accepted. Next came the hurdles.

PASSPORT. Having never traveled outside the U.S. (besides Canada and Mexico, pre-passport requirement), I needed to obtain a passport. We would also need visas, but one of the team leaders was taking care of that for us; however, a passport was needed in order to get a visa, and the turn-around time for those was more questionable. In light of this, understandably, we were asked to get passports as soon as possible. I applied in early March, thinking that would allow plenty of time, as the "normal processing time" was four weeks. Others applied around the same time I did, and received their passports in almost exactly four weeks. I, on the other hand, waited. And waited. And waited. I knew the team leaders were getting anxious to submit the visa application paperwork. I checked with the passport agency, and there was nothing wrong with my application. The status was, "processing." I thought for a moment that this first hurdle might mean I would remain firmly planted on Virginia soil come July. Then, on May 7th (Norway's Independence Day, incidentally), I received my passport in the mail. Thank you God!

FUNDRAISING.  Raising money has been my 9-5 job for nearly 10 years. I have written grants and letters asking corporations, foundations and individuals for donations ranging from $10 to $1 million. But, I have never had to solicit my family and friends. I was nervous about how my "pitch" would come across. I certainly didn't want anyone to feel obligated or guilted into supporting my trip. At the same time, I wanted to make it clear that without their support, it would not happen. Chris, our pastor, regularly encouraged us to "get after it" -- "it" being fundraising; making calls, sending letters and emails, etc. Even with his prompting, I put off sending letters. And put it off some more. And then I realized that it wasn't really up to me. Going on this trip was a divine calling. And in order to go, I would need money. And to get money, I would have to ask and have faith that it would come. When I finally sent out my letters, I was overwhelmed by the response. In no time at all, I already had accumulated more than half my goal. Over the last couple months, some people have backed out of the trip for various reasons, which meant that the individual fundraising goals for the rest of us have been bumped up a couple times. The goal has gone from $2,200 to $2,700 per person. I'm nearly there and would still welcome gifts of all sizes.

SPIRITUALITY.  In my own mind, I've always been relatively steady in my faith. Of course, most everyone has their moments of doubt and uncertainty along the way, and I am no exception. But even through my more "worldly" years, I still turned to God for guidance. This trip has got me thinking hard about my faith -- in a good way. But it has also caused my insecurities and fears to bubble to the surface. Who am I to go halfway around the globe like some sort of Crusader? What difference can I possibly make in the lives of these people? Am I doing this for the right reasons? Am I in this for me, or am I in it for God's purpose? These are the types of anxious thoughts that have been swirling through my mind lately. But today, I was reminded of a wonderful quote by Marianne Williamson that addresses these very questions:

"We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

My prayer for this trip is that I, my team, and the people we serve in Vietnam not only would be liberated from fear, but that we would all recognize our uniqueness, our preciousness, and the invaluable roles we get to play in this world as children of God. 

Hòa bình!

(Peace!)